Nico Tortorella: Gender, Sobriety, Tattoos & Career

When Nico Tortorella talks about identity—gender, sobriety, even the ink on their skin—the conversation rarely stays simple. Over the past decade, the actor has navigated a public shift in pronouns, a nontraditional marriage, and an unconventional approach to staying sober. Here’s what we actually know about the person behind Younger’s most memorable character.

Gender Identity: Non-binary/gender-fluid · Spouse: Bethany C. Meyers (m. 2018) · Years Sober: 11+ · Notable Role: Josh on Younger

Nine key facts, one pattern: Tortorella has deliberately blurred the lines between labels—both on and off screen.

What is Nico Tortorella’s gender identity?

Nico Tortorella has described themself as non-binary and gender-fluid for several years. In a 2019 interview with ABC News, they and their spouse Bethany Meyers both said they identified as non-binary and used they/them pronouns at the time. Tortorella later clarified in an Audible blog post that “nonbinary identity has nothing to do with how someone looks” and that they present “predominantly masculine on a regular basis.”

In 2024, Tortorella posted on Instagram that they now use he/him pronouns, writing “I use he/him pronouns at this point” (Instagram). The shift underscores their view that identity is fluid and not fixed. A 2020 YouTube clip shows them saying they “don’t believe in binaries” and were open to all pronouns (YouTube).

Is Nico Tortorella sober?

Yes. Tortorella has been sober from alcohol for more than 11 years. They told ABC News in 2019 that alcohol was “the one thing” that was “the devil” for them, though they still smoke cannabis. They described their sobriety as “fluid,” adding that it helped them take their work and identity conversations more seriously—a sentiment echoed in ICON Magazine.

Does Nico Tortorella use kratom for sobriety?

• Tortorella credits the plant kratom with helping them maintain long-term sobriety. A 2026 report from PinkNews states they have been sober since 2015, after finishing season one of Younger.
• They reportedly found kratom about eight or nine years after getting sober, meaning around 2023 or 2024.
• Kratom is a controversial plant—classified as a dietary supplement in the U.S. but with regulatory debate over safety and addiction potential.

The implication: Tortorella’s embrace of kratom places them at the center of a larger public health debate. For now, they frame it as a personal tool, not a recommendation.

For another perspective on celebrity sobriety, see Jeremy Allen White: Divorce, Sobriety, Kids & Net Worth.

Does Nico Tortorella really have all those tattoos?

Yes. Tortorella’s tattoos are extensive and often visible on screen. Their character Josh on Younger was a tattoo artist, and Tortorella has hosted the show How Far Is Tattoo Far? (YouTube).

Why does Nico Tortorella have a blackout tattoo?

• Tortorella has a large blackout piece on their arm that covers scars. They received the tattoo while filming The Walking Dead: World Beyond in 2020–2021, as reported by People Magazine.
• In interviews, they’ve said the tattoo has personal meaning and is part of their visual storytelling.

The pattern: Tortorella’s ink tells a story of scars turned into art, reflecting a life lived publicly yet on their own terms.

Who is Nico Tortorella’s wife?

Nico Tortorella married Bethany C. Meyers in March 2018. Meyers is a fitness entrepreneur and podcaster, and both have publicly described their relationship as nontraditional. In a 2019 ABC News segment, they discussed navigating an open marriage and co-parenting.

What is Nico Tortorella’s relationship with Bethany Meyers?

Beyond marriage, the couple co-hosts a podcast and announced a new TV project in 2025. They have children together, though the family prefers to keep details private. Meyers also identifies as non-binary, and the two have been vocal about building a partnership that defies conventional scripts (ABC News).

The pattern: Tortorella’s marriage is as fluid as their identity—publicly transparent about structure, privately protective of intimacy.

What movies and TV shows has Nico Tortorella been in?

Tortorella’s breakout role was Josh on TV Land’s Younger (2015–2021). They have also appeared in films like Scream 4 (2011) and Twelve (2010), and more recently in AMC’s The Walking Dead: World Beyond.

What is Nico Tortorella’s role in Younger?

They played Josh, a tattoo artist in his late twenties, opposite Sutton Foster and Hilary Duff. The role made them a household name in scripted cable TV (PrideSource).

What is Nico Tortorella’s net worth?

• Multiple sources estimate net worth between $1–3 million, though exact figures are unconfirmed.
• Income streams include acting, modeling, podcasting, and social media partnerships.

The trade-off: Tortorella’s willingness to share personal struggles may limit certain high-grossing commercial roles, but it deepens their connection with audiences who value authenticity over polish.

Timeline of key events

• 1988: Born in Wilmette, Illinois.
• 2011: Cast in Scream 4.
• 2014 (approx.): Begins sobriety journey; credits kratom later.
• 2015–2021: Stars as Josh on Younger. Gets sober in 2015 after finishing season one (PinkNews).
• 2018: Marries Bethany C. Meyers (ABC News).
• 2020–2021: Appears in The Walking Dead: World Beyond; receives blackout tattoo (People).
• 2024: Announces use of he/him pronouns on Instagram (Instagram).
• 2025: Announces new TV show with wife Bethany.

What this means: The timeline shows a life marked by deliberate reinvention—from acting breakthrough to sobriety to evolving pronouns—each step reshaping their public narrative.

Clarity check

Confirmed facts

• Nico Tortorella identifies as non-binary/gender-fluid (ABC News)
• They are married to Bethany C. Meyers (ABC News)
• They have been sober from alcohol for over 11 years (PinkNews)
• They credit kratom for their sobriety (PinkNews)
• They have a blackout tattoo covering scars (People)

What’s unclear

• Exact kratom dosage and regimen
• Precise net worth (estimates only)
• Specific dates for early sobriety milestones
• Exact timeline of pronoun shifts
• Complete list of tattoos and meanings

The takeaway: The confirmed facts rest on reputable sources, while the unknowns highlight areas the actor keeps deliberately vague.

Voices on identity and recovery

Alcohol was the one thing that was the devil for me. I still smoke weed, I definitely have a drink every now and again, but that’s not a relapse—that’s just me being honest about who I am.

— Nico Tortorella, ABC News (2019)

Sobriety helped me take my work and my identity more seriously—before, when I was drinking too much, it was harder for people to accept my lifestyle choices.

— Nico Tortorella, ICON Magazine (2019)

Our relationship works because we let it be whatever it needs to be—no script, no rules, just honesty.

— Bethany C. Meyers, ABC News (2019)

Across these voices, a common thread emerges: fluidity is a tool for authenticity, not indecision.

Summary

Tortorella’s journey across gender, sobriety, and self-expression challenges the idea that public figures must pick one lane. For fans navigating their own fluid identities, the lesson is clear: Tortorella’s path shows that authenticity may cost some easy slots, but it can buy something rarer—a community that grows with you.

For a deeper look into Nico Tortorellas gender and sobriety journey, including their use of kratom and marriage to Bethany Meyers, this profile covers all the key milestones.

Frequently asked questions

For more on addiction and legacy in Hollywood, read about Chris Farley’s Death: SNL Firing, Addiction and Lasting Legacy.